Archive | December, 2011

Freedom Is A Beautiful Thang!

31 Dec
Two words: LICENSE, BABY!!! ❤Yes, the answer to every adolescent’s (well, young adult’s) prayers! A license! That official-plastic card of sweet freedom! I’m excited! It’s been almost a year of a busy schedule, procrastination, and my father’s “professional driver” driving lessons, but…FINALLY!

I decided to talk about freedom today because it’s rarely spoken about anymore! Living in America and all, we have freedoms that’s unheard of in other countries and for that, I’m grateful. I’m one of those unorthodox kind of people. I think about unusual things like: freedom, nature’s beauty, God’s creation, how fast time is going lately (Can you believe we’re two days away from the New Year, it’s ridiculous!). You know things like that.

But freedom really is a beautiful thing: freedom of mind, freedom of speech, freedom of the press (I promise I won’t get political; it ends here.) I don’t know where I’d be without any of these freedoms.

Side note: I’m auditioning for the X Factor (you know, that awesome singing T.V. show with the amazing Simon Cowell who I’ve wanted to sing in front of for years now? You know the one!)!!! Fingers folded in prayer for me, please! 🙂

#Joni Juelissa ❤

Posted by Joni Juelissa

Shots and Diaries

23 Dec

Nostalgia. I like the word and the memories it upbrings. And being me that always means humorous memories. For those of you blog-hards who don’t know what nostalgia is it’s basically when you desire to return back to a past time in your life. For example, watching Teenick’s late night 90’s TV special and wishing you were seven years old again while doing scholarship essays. (I’ve been doing this all Winter break so far.)


It’s pretty easy to be overtaken in an nostalgic moment. I always find myself going back into my old diaries. (I’ve gone from being in love with That’s So Raven and Lil’ Romeo to Ridiculousness and Hot Hot Heat; how times have changed me.) But to be honest, I’m glad these moments can still happen. I constantly have nightmares about waking up one morning and no old cartoons like As Told By Ginger…. and Teen Titans [which btw AREN’T played anymore 😦 ] can be found to reminisce back on. Speaking of which, let me just say how sorry I am for the future generations. I’ve seen some of these new cartoons (I won’t name any names…for now) and it makes me wanna cry. It makes me want to find the writers and yell, “You know what wholesome humor is! You were brought up watching them! Why are you doing this to us?!”

On the other hand, guess who got their college shots recently? Yep. This girl. I’ve been lucky and have never had the chicken pow before, but still I find myself with a burning arm from a chicken pox vaccination shot. Why and me?

#Joni Juelissa ❤

Followers and Rejections

23 Dec

I keep wondering when my life will get any easier. Maybe it’ll be when I leave for college, maybe when I actually find a guy worth my time, maybe when some awesome-understanding literary agent wants to tell me more than just: Great idea…but I pass. Good luck though.


I’m frustrated, yes, but I have a reason to be. And don’t worry it ends here; I don’t wanna be one of those ridiculous high-on-teen-angst bloggers (if there’s any, I said that for comedic relief).

Alright, followers and rejections……


When I say followers, I mean your friends and those awesome strangers who care about the thoughts of someone they’ve never even met before. It means a lot; especially to someone who needs to vent after a low day. Therefore, those guys (or girls, for the feminists out there) are freakin’ awesome!

When I say rejections, I don’t mean JUST the two sucky letters I’ve received in the past two months from agents who I wanted to represent my first book, (that’s right, I’m getting published soon!). I also mean college rejections and relationship rejections. (Which, ironically enough, I shouldn’t blog about because I’m usually the dumpee).

An epiphany came to me this morning as I woke up all giddy and excited (boy, would I get a rude awakening later): querying literary agents is EXACTLY like applying to colleges. Don’t believe me, let’s dissect the processes:

BOTH must be applied for.

BOTH accept based on qualities (writing style, idea vs. GPA, SAT scores)


BOTH wish you best of luck after rejecting you (Well, actually I’m not entirely sure of that part because I’ve been accepted to every college I applied for).

Anyhoo, it seems this fury of mine ain’t (yes, I’m using this word even though I’m from Queens and ain’t isn’t a word. Screw you, dictionary, because no matter what you say AIN”T is NOT a word) going away.

When I look back on this, I’m probably gonna laugh, but for now.

#Joni Juelissa ❤

Is Music Dying A Slow, Fist Pumping Death?

19 Dec

What’s it been two weeks?!?! Really sorry guys, the Christmas season takes a lot of time away from musicians/writers/students. Seriously. It’s ridiculous.

Now on with the blog:

Let’s talk music. I love it all from Hip-Hop to Indie (which is my favorite actually) to Alternative to you get the point…but some of this mainstream music (ahem, Pop) is starting to kill a sista.


(if you can’t see it)

Literally, I was just looking at the new Now That’s What I Call Music whatever year they’re on now commercial and every unz-unz in every song sounded the same! I’m musically inclined so my first instinct was to start clapping to see if the beat stayed the same and guess what I found?!…but I digress.

My point in writing this blog isn’t to start bashing Jersey Shore (no matter how bad I truly want to), my point is to discuss mainstream music in general. Why is it that genres like Indie and Punk Rock aren’t played as often on the radio now? Music with meaningful lyrics? (Lyrics other than the kind advertising the “making babies” process and drugs?) Whatever happened to head banging, hair swinging bands like Green Day and groups like Outkast being played on the radio to dance crazy to? And how in the world did we go from thinking dancing free but on beat was cool to pumping our fists in place and grinding on guys?

So, here’s my generation cry out letter.

Dear Generation X,Y,and possibly Z,

Youtube it up! Find that musical genius that’s gonna save us from thinking up more dance moves that’ll have us regretting our nights out.

#Joni Juelissa ❤

The Talk

6 Dec

When you have The Talk with my parents, three things are bound to happen:

1. You WILL cry
2. You WILL laugh and
3. You WILL (somehow consensually) confess something you swore you never would.

I don’t know how; they’re like priests or something. I’m just waiting for their confessions of once being a part of the Catholic faith. I mean, they’ve broken people I didn’t think even had feelings…I’ll have to leave the name of that person anonymous.

 <— in case, you can’t see the caption: made even more awkward with the book.

Most of the time, The Talk isn’t even about sex. (except that one time, but I’ll blog about that later). For the most part, it’s about life. They’re based on things I say when I’m pissed off.

What if I don’t wanna go to college?!

…Is it really that wrong to laugh at dirty jokes? (I’m talking racist and sexist here, guys. I have the honor of fitting into both categories. yay!?!?)

What’s wrong with saying douchebag?! <<(This one’s a constant)

You get the point.

 I’m honestly not a cat person at all, but I’ve been posting cat pictures all day…my Jewish friends may be persuading me…Oh. No.

Well, if you’ve had The Talk (you know, that one that was so awkward, or so hilarious–this one’s preferable) or just A Talk (one worth reading on a Monday at 7:40 something-ish at night.) Post back!

It’s Official!

4 Dec

NO idea why I decided to write a confessional already (seeing that I don’t have a legit fanbase yet), but I thought What the Heck? This’ll be fun to look back on when I rule the Internet with my humorous genius. So:

                                                                       It’s Official

  1. I’m sick of atleast a quarter of the people I’m friends with on Facebook.

Let me just PMHO (Pour My Heart Out) on this one. Ya see, I’m friends with different kinds of people: the girls who only talk about how in love they are with their boyfriend, the guys who rant on and on every day about how everyone they know is “stupid” and “I hate the world” <— Of course, I’m just being nice and leaving out the words they really said.

 Then you have those friends who only seem to be online to ask you for favors. Just some examples, “Hey, can I catch a ride to school with you tomorrow?”, “Do you know how (Insert teacher who I swear lives for the joy of torturing us with BS homework’s name here) wants this paper?”, etc.

 I love these people (I mean, I “like” their statuses and stuff and have respect for them), but guys, complaining on Facebook about life sucking? Really? Don’t bum people out with that stuff!

        2. I’ve officially decided to post every day–except Sundays!

 I’m gonna be like the Internet’s Chick-Fil-A or something–I mean, hopefully if I post funny stuff six times a week, eventually someone’ll run across it and pass on the Only Joni goodness! (Speaking of which, right now: Get on Facebook (if you’re not already on) and share this. Go, I’ll wait……..’Kay)

       3. This blog is gonna be frickin’ awesome….or one of the greatest fails of my life if no one reads it!

 No explanation needed hopefully I mean, that’s pretty much self-explanatory!

 So to all you amazing Internet people out there I say: MAKE ME PROUD!

 FB share this, e-mail this to your friends old and new (I’m talking age and friendship status here), Print this out and post it somewhere random (and try not to get arrested in the process).

 Oh! One more thing!


 Comment me about anything (I don’t like haters though so don’t go commenting hater posts). I do appreciate comments so comment back on my posts (what you liked about the post, what you think I should talk more about on the topic of that post, a funny story my post reminded you of, etc.) Which leads me to: SUGGEST.

 Suggest topics for me! (and I don’t say this because I’m already running out of ideas because trust me I’ve constantly got plenty ideas and can go on and on about anything!) But if you have a question or need advice about something, anything just HMU (Joni got you!)

 And don’t forget to follow! I like followers. If this was Tumblr, I’d give all of my followers gifts.

 Fin. (I’ll think of a more creative closing tomorrow!)

#Joni Juelissa ❤

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